31 August 2012

Hurricane Zealot

While Isaac built up steam, I heard murmurs to this effect. Truthfully, I'm surprised it's taken as many days for this bullshit to surface.

Bloviating zealot.

I've never been to Southern Decadence and it's not likely that I'll go. Mardi Gras in New Orleans, straight or gay, just doesn't appeal to me.

My only Mardi Gras experience took place in Port Arthur, Texas, where we were able do some of the usual Mardi Gras stuff, like watch floats, drink beer, get hit in the face with beads and listen to great Zydeco music. Until this time, I didn't know that other places like Port Arthur, Mobile, or a host of other Gulf Coast cities and towns observed the holiday. As such, I'm happy to have a little of the carnival experience between Epiphany and Ash Wednesday without the drunken crowds and their vomit/urine/YIKES in the streets.

Ooohh, SCARY! (
I've seen the annual photos and watched numerous videos of both Mardi Gras and Southern Decadence. Behaviorally, they look pretty much the same to me. Either one is a curiosity, one that I can watch from the quiet comfort of my home without being elbowed, mugged or trampled. It's sort of like watching that moron and her brat daughter Honey Boo Boo. A train wreck.

Clearly, there are people who enjoy this sort of thing, though, as evidenced by the throngs that flood the French Quarter in February and September. And, I'm thrilled that they have the opportunity. What I find less thrilling, however, is the lunatic zealots trying to blame the gays for natural disasters.

Convenient, isn't it, that the "straight" carnival happens in February -- far removed from hurricane season? Idiots like American Family Association's Buster Wilson apparently don't cotton much to science. If he did, he'd realize a hurricane hitting New Orleans in the middle of hurricane season isn't so unusual. Right? Oh, but wait -- it's because of the gays.

Bead-worthy in 1860.
Best I can tell, the earliest recorded hurricane to hit New Orleans was in October, 1527. Between then and now, 86 hurricanes have hit Louisiana's coast. Prior to 1974, when Southern Decadence had its modest beginnings, what could Louisianans have possibly done to earn being smote 68 times, Buster? What of the years, like 1860, when hurricanes struck in August, September and October?

I'd send the blathering, Bible-twisting buffoon this interesting, fact-laden paper in its entirety if I thought it would do the rest of us any good by shutting him or the rest of his fellow loonies up for good. But, I know it wouldn't.

So, I'll take great delight in my favorite part of The Advocate's article from the first link above: "Rev. Grant Storms, a regular antigay activist who has railed against Southern Decadence, was recently arrested for masturbating in public."

Yeah. Let's listen to them about righteousness.

And, if you're at Southern Decadence, have a hurricane for me.

Source: "Louisiana Hurricane History" (David Roth, National Weather Service, Camp Springs, MD)